Boy meets girl.
She smiles sweetly but shrugs, ‘Je ne comprend pas’.
They say love has no barriers
But it would seem a Croydon boy’s limited grasp of French is all it takes to stop
True love
In its tracks.
Turning back, he smiles.
The smile of a man safe in the knowledge that if he’d paid more attention in class
She’d be his.
Minutes later…
Answering her mobile phone,
In a suspiciously cockney tone,
‘Alright Dave, on the train, back at 10.’
Poor men.
Little did he know her French girl act was less fact, more fiction
And her diction
More Pinner than Paris.
© Zoë Porteous
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Very brave indeed (as per your twitter).
But bravo, as well – and more please.
If you want advice, I’d say the 4/5 line could do with a little work to improve the flow or whatever.
Splendid.
Thanks Ian, really appreciate it.
NP – just losing “in fact” makes it better to my ear.
Cheers Ian – have played around with it. Have format issues too, guess I need more WordPress practice to get it to display how I want